Tuesday, January 10, 2012

A rant....

I am going to break away from my typical food postings and just speak my mind for a minute.  Today I started a new semester.  Really shouldn't be that big of a deal, I'm practically a pro at this point, but for some reason, each new semester always feels like the first day ever.  What will my professors be like?  Will they be fair or difficult?  Will I like my classmates? Will I do well?  All typical questions I suppose, but today was much worse for some reason.  My six year old, who is still recovering from her t&a, was sick.  Not so sick that she couldn't go to school, but really borderline.  Today, while navigating the newness of new classes, my daughter was on my mind.  All the familiar questions and emotions of a new semester were rushing through my head along with new ones.....Why did I wait until I had a child to pursue a degree?  Is this even fair to my husband and daughter?  Can I really hold out with this insane schedule I currently have until I graduate?  Will this very expensive piece of paper I am working towards really be worth the effort?  Will my child make it through the day and if not, who will pick her up?  My parents work, my sisters are in school....I have no back-up.  It's stressful. 

As I sat in class pondering my life (or lack of it), I began to study my classmates.  Suddenly I felt very old.  I was surrounded by fresh-faced young ladies who were fresh out of high school.  Most were obviously carefree and probably attending on mommy and daddy's money.  So carefree in fact, they couldn't even bother to dress professionally.  Most were in sweats, wearing no makeup and had their hair up in ponytails.  Don't get me wrong, I am no diva by any means, but I felt out of place in my white button up and khaki pants.  My face was sporting a ligh application of Bare escentuals and my hair was pulled back in a neat ponytail with sideswept bangs.  For those of you who don't know, my major is elementary education and I shared that major with a huge portion of my classmates today.  Despite it's low-pay and social status, the field of education is a white collar, professional career.  As I continued to observe my fellow classmates, I became increasingly disgusted by their lack of preparedness and concern.  Few students had even purchased the required books for class!  Really?  I also can't forget to mention that 65% of the class came in late and saw nothing wrong wilth leaving their cell phones on during a lecture. 

While I won't continue to bore you with details, I left classes today feeling a bit sad.  After spending the day surrounded by our future educators, I feel our poor children have a hard row to hoe.  We do not need teachers who have gone into the field for the "cushy" 175 day work schedule only.  Our children deserve the undivided attention of a teacher who DOESN"T lecture with her cell phone constantly in her hand.  Our children deserve the kind of teachers that I consistently had as a child.  Persons that strived to make a difference..all the while maintaing a professional, moral presence.  Ugh.....Sorry for the rant, but I just had to get that off my chest. 

2 comments:

  1. The thing is that the Lord knows what you need. Blogging is a good way to rant and vent and we all need that ability. In time you'll know there's a reason for everything.

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    1. So true! Life is a journey full of lessons, humility and working hard to love others--even when they are different or have different ideals. May every day be less of a challenge than the day before!

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